Desperate Housewifes
Saturday, December 5th, 2009 | Humour & Stuff
It`s NOT a post about the US-series which is quite popular by some of us…
It IS about modern women who a often torn between their familiy life, household and career. It sounds like another popular topic but I think I can talk about it now more sensitive and analyzing `cause I`m feeling stuck in this dilemma right now. So this is what I`m worried about. I want to pick out just some main subjects to talk about here:
1. Why the technological progress doesn`t really help in the household?
2. Ideas about priorities in modern family-life and a differing reality
It took me some time to realize that a hoover, a washing machine, a dish washer, a microwave and several other household appliances are indeed helpful with our housework, BUT do not really save time at all!! All day long women are operating all those machines knowing about their technical efficiency and asking themselves how our grandmothers could survive without it. At the same time our grandmothers are a remembering the times when they had to do the household with their bare hands and wondering why modern housewives are still complaining about the masses of work they have to do at home. So why? Are we just getting lazy? Are our grandmothers hero’s of housework?
Their next reproach is our reluctance to get just one child instead of 3 or even more! So we often hear our grandma saying:”When I was as young as you are (certainly already married), I had already 5 children and I never complained…!S0, don`t make such a fuss about it!” Are we incapable to get on with just one kid? Are we just too selfish, thinking only about our freedom and self-realization?
I think the main reason for our (women) excessiveve demands is the ongoing individualization in our society and the feminism paradigm which are just pushing us more and more into the dilemma I`ve described above! Telling about their “heroic deeds” our grandmas forget to tell us about the task sharing and the strong family bonds in the past. No woman or mother of 5 children had to wash, cook, clean up, shopping foods, watch her kids and doing homework with them, being perfectly styled and having a part time job at once!!! It`s just impossible! Extended families have been sharing the different responsibilities. Everybody has been conscious of her/his work to do. Grandma`s have been cooking and caring about children all day long, while the younger women (not just one person) of the family did all the homework and the men earned the money. I know, this paradigm is not popular in our modern society but at the same time it`s also not realistic to burden women with all those work! When do Men realize it and don`t ask questions like “What do you do all day long sitting here at home?”, when do Women realize that its no sign of weakness to ask for help and when do Families realize that solidarity and family bonds are essential and necessary to keep it going? Unfortunately women in modern society are often very alone with their tasks and kids, families are at odds with each other, partnerships are unstable and patchwork families are normal.
The pressure on women is growing enormously especially in terms of decision for or against starting a family, being a good housewife or wife and growing up children. Many of us have serious doubts if they have to “give up” themselves for a new life full of problems. Indeed it is quite hard to have the heart to start this new part of life but I think it`s also a new chance for Your family to be awake of those values I talked above. A new family must not to repeat the faults of unrealistic (modern) ideologies or outdated advices of parents. Rather, it is in your hands (women and also men) to brake up our desperation!
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